At the end of February I went through the worst time in my life … I had a miscarriage. You can read about it in my post here. Since then I have been off work as I haven’t coped well with it. I have felt guilty about being off; I know that some people go back to work quite quickly, but this is one of those things that people deal with differently and for me, I haven’t been able to.

The time has come though, when I feel that I should go back to work. So next Wednesday I will return full time and to be honest, I don’t really know how I feel.

I’m worried about seeing everyone and what people will think about me having had a miscarriage and having been off for quite a while. I’m worried about how I will respond if someone mentions my miscarriage to me. I’m worried about how I will cope getting back into full time work in a pressured job (which I do like, but have been away from it for what seems like ages). I’m worried that I will have forgotten how to do my job. I’m worried that my professional reputation will have taken a dint because I’ve been off for so long. I’m worried I won’t be regarded as a strong, reliable employee. I’m worried about being around so many people as I have spent most of time trying to get through this by being only with my close family. I’m worried that my workload will have decreased so that I spend a lot of time dwelling on my thoughts. A member of my team has a baby due any time now and I’m worried how I will feel about that (and I feel guilty about feeling worried about how I will feel because I think it seems so nasty and selfish of me – does that make sense?).

What am I looking forward to? Emm … that’s kind of a harder question to answer. I am quite looking forward to doing some work and not feeling guilty about being off. I am looking forward to trying to pick up where I left off with my prospective career progression. Ok, I’m struggling now.

I have to say that my work have been really supportive with what I’ve been through and haven’t put any pressure on me. My decision to go back to work next week is my decision, no one has said I need to go back now “or else.” I think I have to do this and try to move on with my life, and even thought that’s what I am going to try to do, I will never ever forget my baby. This is something I am always going to be sad about, but I have to go on.

Have any of you at any time had to return to work after a while off? How did you feel going back and how did it actually go?

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39 thoughts on “Returning To Work After 3 Months Off

  1. Best of luck for returning to work will be thinking of you and i won’t wish you luck because you know how to do your job and that won’t have changed

  2. I feel so sorry for you and I wish you all the happiness in the world. I know it may seem hard to work after 3 months away but I promise you it will get easier. That sound so predictable to say. I am sure you will be fine but if you do get upset, I think you have to be truthful to your co-workers because I am sure they will understand. Maybe if you ever feel sad about the miscarriage and you feel like you need to say it out loud but don’t want to talk to anyone, you can always dm on Twitter. Always here for you. LOVE A X

  3. Wishing you a good transition back to your work routine.

    I’m so sorry to hear about your loss. There’s no one way to cope and I’m glad your work has been supportive of you taking the time you need. Your feelings are valid and you’re allowed to give yourself the space to come to terms with them.

    Sending ❤️❤️,
    Emily

  4. Best of luck returning to work! From what you wrote I think you’ll not have to worry that much and just get back into the flow. I can’t imagine what you went through but I hope working again will help you.
    Lea, xx

  5. I’m so, so sorry first of all. I can’t imagine what you’ve been through, I’m always here if you want to talk. Secondly, it sounds as though your work have been great, which is brilliant, hopefully they’ll be a good support network for you. I’ve recently gone back to work and it was hard and a strange adjustment, but I loved being able to use my brain again and I loved being busy. I went in for a half day first, just to try and catch up on things and ease back into the swing of working.

    I hope it all goes well for you xxxxx

    1. Thank you so much for your kind words, I really appreciate them. My doctor recommended that I go back on a phased return but I was nervous about speaking to work about this, but hearing that’s what you did has given me the reassurance to speak to them about this.

      Thanks again and hope you are alright (after returning to work) 🙂 xx

    1. Thank you, that’s very kind. Yeah I need to make sure I take everything one step at a time; I’m usually really bad for just going 100 miles an hour and wanting to do everything. Great advice, thanks 🙂 xx

  6. I returned to work after 2 years. It was the most nerve racking experience of my life! I did not have to go back to people I knew I started I new job but it was still so daunting. I felt like I even forgot how to answer the phone! x
    Lola Mia // http://www.lolitabonita.co.uk

  7. Oh hun I am so sorry you are going through this.
    I had a long period off when I was working, due to outside issues and honestly, the thought of going back is worse than actually being back. You will be just fine. Big hugs

  8. I’m so sorry, my lovely. I’m sure going back to work will be daunting, but the apprehension ought to pass. You know what you’re doing at your job, and I’m sure once you get back into the swing of things, it’ll get easier again. Try not to think too much about how you should be acting, just do what you need to do and take things one day at a time. Best of luck! <3
    Juliet | notcapulet.co.uk

    1. Thank you 🙂 Yeah I need to focus on taking things one day at a time & one step at a time. I tend to just rush off and through myself into things. Thank you for your kind words and advice 🙂 x

  9. I am sorry to hear about your miscarriage :(. I’m sure your colleagues will be happy to see you again, so don’t worry. Maybe you should pop in to say before your first official day back to break the ice?

  10. I am so sorry to hear about what you went through It really must be one of the hardest things to deal with. But it seems like you are now ready to restart your life, which doesn’t in any way mean that you are forgetting your baby! From what it sounds like, your work are great and I’m sure they will continue to be supportive when you are back. I hope everything will go smoothly on your return! You deserve all the best ☺️ xxx

  11. What an honest and very well articulated post. I’m sorry you’ve been what you’ve been through, and everything you’re feeling is totally normal and understandable. If the company you work for is worth their salt, you’ll have a return to work meeting when you back (and if you don’t, then request one) so you can air any uncertainties and feelings to your superior. That way they’ll be able to see how much your work means to you, but they’ll understand how much you needed to take the time after what you went through. Best of luck.

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